My Shortest Blog Thus Far

Okay, so apparently lots of people got confused on my last blog and really thought that I was quitting my job. I just want to clarify...although I WISH I could quit my job so I could go do all of those fun things, there is no way that would be possible. So, I am NOT quitting my job...

Oh my silly friends! I thought for sure you would pick up on it when I said in my last paragraph that I can afford the lifestyle if I "marry a sugar daddy!" I thought it was clear sarcasm! But I will be more cautious in the future...I don't want to spur on any other rumors of my own life! HA!

By the way, I'm moving to Denver.... NOT! Just joking! Testing your abilities...hopefully you didn't fall for that one...

Quitting my J-O-B!

I've decided that I'm not going to work anymore. Nope, no more jobs for Claire! I've just really come to enjoy the freedoms of my days! I really like going to class, so I'll keep school...but other than that, the rest of my day is up to me! I trained this morning with Pam and then went to a spin class right after. Now I'm at Panera eating a super fab salad and coffee writing! I'm actually going to be writing papers and then reading for class, but this is a good warm up for my little nimble fingers...

So that's it. I'm turning in my resignation to the ice arena tomorrow, and I'm not going to substitute teach either. My days will be filled with classes at the YMCA, classes at EMU, shopping, getting my hair done (today at 3!), maybe I'll start getting my nails done too. I can read for pleasure, I can do WHATEVER I want to do! That's the incredible beauty of it! If I decide to take a quick trip to Chicago to visit my wonderful Nikole, then I could do! No need to take days off or anything, just hop in my car, fill up my gas tank and drive off! I could become a food critic and travel all over tasting yummy (hopefully!) food and then blog about it. I could go to matinee's, I could sit at the park all day, I could go visit Luke all day long...I could hop on a plane and go visit my sister...oh the possibilities are endless!!

So that's why I decided to quit. Endless possibilities of what I can do with my day...I'm relaxed already...oh, but you're probably wondering how I will afford all of this globe-trotting, food consuming, shopping, movie watching life?

I'm going to have to marry a sugar daddy. If you know of any who are up for the job, please send them my way...unless Luke wants to win that Mega Millions...that would be most ideal...so hey Luke! Can you please please PLEASE win those Mega Millions so I don't have to marry some weirdo in order to get my job-free life?? Thanks Love....

Hello. My name is Claire, and I'm a Book Snob

My boyfriend teases me because I refuse to check out books from the library. He asks, "what, are you too good for the library?" and the simple truth is: Yes. and no. Allow me to explain...

Eight years ago I checked out a book from my city's public library. I read the book for research, referenced it in my paper, cited it appropriately, and then returned the book to the library, via the drop box. A while later, I received a notice in the mail saying that I had an overdue book. I thought, well maybe I didn't return that one with the rest. So I looked around my room, the living room, the family room, the family room, the kitchen, the bathrooms (yup, even there), the basement...EVERYWHERE! It was not in the house, and I thought to myself, I KNOW I returned that book! I could remember putting it in the drop box. The library must've lost it...so crazy. I promptly forgot about it and did what all teenage senior girls did: focused on the Prom.

A short time later I returned to my public library to check out a book, but was told that until I paid the amount of the book that I "had never returned" I would not be allowed to check out a book. SO BOGUS! I left the library, and have not returned since. Mainly because I'm afraid they'll deny me again. Also, I have a fear of being escorted out by the grandpa library security man.

So I began to buy my books. Which turned out to be quite nice. There's nothing better than opening a book for the very first time. No one has ripped a page, or written in it, or folded down the corners yet. No one has smudged the pages with their Cheet-o fingers. Everything is crisp and fresh and new. No gross library smell...just the scent of new pages yearning to be read.

Being an English major, it made sense for me to buy my books, because as my mom said, I needed to build my OWN library! So that is what I began to do. Friends will come over and peruse what I have and then ask to borrow one (or two or three...LINDSEY! haha! Just kidding!!). I feel great when people read the books that I've chosen and they say "Wow! I really loved that book! I couldn't put it down!"

My fabulous friend Meredith recently moved to Texas, and in order to do so, she and her husband had to sell most of they owned, including her books. She is a fellow lit major and book snob, and it broke her heart to have to get rid of her books. She kept some, but got rid of most. I don't know if most of you realize this or not, but giving up books is probably harder to do than selling your house, pet, or child. It's a heartwrenching process. You need someone strong by your side to ask you three important questions (as Meredith had to do):

1. When's the last time you read this book?

2. Did you enjoy reading it?

3. Would you read it again?

If you can answer NO to any one of those questions, you should sell the book, or give it to your local Salvation Army. I would suggest the library, but they've left a fairly sour taste in my mouth...

The thing about Meredith and I, is that we probably only read half of the books that we own. However, one day when our husbands build us libraries with comfy oversized chairs to sit in, and couches to lay on, and fireplaces to turn on (that's right, TURN ON!! Where's the power button?! Give me simple over having to follow fire safety anyday...that is so BORING!), we will have 3 walls full of books (only 3 because we'll need a wall for the windows, door, and fireplace...we're clearly still in the planning process here) and people will come over and they will say, "holy cow! You have so many books! Have you read of all these?" and we can proudly say "YES. Yes I have." Because whether we bought them and they were duds, or we bought them and they were fabulous, or we bought them for a class and never picked them up again, we still read them. Sometimes more than once.

The important thing about having books that professors made me read is this: If I only had books that I chose to read, I would have the world's largest collection of Chick-Lit ever in one room, save for Barnes & Noble. And women who only have Chick-Lit are never taken as seriously as someone who has a wide variety. Sure, I'd prefer to read Confessions of a Shopaholic every month rather than pick up Pride and Prejudice once, but my houseguest doesn't need to know that! They just need to be impressed! And who knows, maybe someday I really will pick up Aloft or The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and reread it...just maybe I will...

Claire's Terrible, Horribly, No Good, Very Bad Day

I woke up nice and early today, 5:30 am, so I would have plenty of time to get ready for my first day of Pre-Student Teaching. I left my house at 6:40am, and by 7:04 was 7 minutes from the middle school (according to my Google Map). But I couldn't find the street to turn onto. So I kept driving. For twenty minutes. And ended up on the other side of the city. So I turned around and drove back, but it was a maze of one way streets, so I ended up in a different city. Luckily, I was near the freeway so I jumped on and called my good friend Jen, who was already at work so she looked up a map and directed me to the school. Whew! Finally.

I sign in and go up to the teachers room. She asks me my name, then ignores me for the next 15 minutes. I had to ask her questions to get her to talk to me. I ask her if I could go over a read aloud with her next week, she says most people don't do the read aloud until the end of the semester. Then the kids file in and sit down. She doesn't introduce me. She doesn't look in my direction. She completely ignores me. She teaches a history lesson. Her student teacher teaches a language arts lesson. Language arts is what I'm supposed to be observing her teach. I ask if I can read the poem she mentioned in her history lesson next week. She says I can.

I drive to school. I read my articles for class. I eat Subway. I think about my double date that night. At least I have that to look forward to. I go to class. It's okay. Goes by quickly. I check my email. My double date is cancelling...I go to my next class. I'm dripping in sweat. I wish I had brought a change of clothes so I wasn't in my dress pants and sweater vest. I can literally feel the trickle of sweat running down my back. I go to the bathroom and dab a paper towel on my face, it doesn't really do too much to matte out the shine.

I go to class. I'm annoyed that my friend cancelled our date, I was really looking forward to it. I sit through class. We read a quote by Thoreau. It says something about "one and a half wit, and a half wit....a third of a wit." I get confused instantly just trying to figure out if a third goes into one and a half. I'm annoyed with my professor. Well, I suppose I'm annoyed with myself for feeling so stupid and not getting the quote that everyone else is animately discussing.

I drive home. I talk to my boyfriend. He's decided that since we're not double dating anymore he's not going to come out either. I try for two different calls to convince him to still come out. My mom calls. I'm almost in tears about my morning. She suggests that I go see my professor. So I email my professor who's in charge of pre-student teaching. She calls me.

I explain what happened this morning. She says that she's been asking me to meet with the teacher since spring, and that I have to make it work. She says, "Well, you say you're going to the school." I say, "I HAVE been going to the school. Today was my first day, as I was scheduled for Monday's and last Monday was Labor Day. I've been emailing her all summer and she hasn't responded to me, except in the group emails she cc's you on. I've been asking her if I could come in and meet her and go over the curriculum and help set up bulletin boards. I've explained that I work full time and wouldn't be able to come until after August, and she has never once responded to me."

I'm pissed. Who is she to make this out to be my fault?! She sounded so annoyed, like, how do I have the gall to complain about these things?! Well guess what? These are legitimate concerns!! She should not brush me off like she did!! I'm so mad!!! I was hoping that writing would get my anger out and make me feel better, but guess what?

It didn't.

Waiting...

I think that I might be going through withdrawal. You see, when you're gone for so long, my heart gets all achey, and it makes my whole body ache for you. I just want you to hug me, maybe a big bearhug, a real body squisher. That way I'll be as close to you as I possibly could be. Then maybe a nice long kiss...I would like that...Then we can just hold hands and walk the dog to the lake (because she'll probably need to pee after all the lake water she drank when she swam), and in the moonlit rain we'll kiss some more. And hug more. Lots of hugs.

You will probably smell like day old boy, because you probably didn't shower before you left your tournament, but I won't mind. Well, I'll probably be thinking in my head, "man, I wish he would've put some extra deodorant or cologne on!" But I won't tell you that. You'll be wearing your shorts with the holes so big your wallet is in danger of falling out. You will have a huge goatee that will scratch my chin, but it's so long now that it's not so scratchy anymore, it's soft.

I will probably be in my favorite jeans and a sweatshirt. Waiting for you with the chocolate chips cookies that I recently burned in the oven. I want you to know that I don't burn everything. Just lately it seems like I do burn everything. But I promise that I don't. I'll have the TV on and will hear your key in the lock and wonder if I should jump up and hug you before you get in the door, or wait for you to come in and put your stuff down. Should I awkwardly stand up or let you awkwardly come over to the couch? I'll probably stand up and walk over to you.

But maybe you'll come to the back sliding door. I usually just keep the blinds shut, so I won't know you're there, and Gauge doesn't always pay attention, so if you knock it will freak me out. But then I'll realize that it's you, my favorite person in the whole wide world, and my heart will jump up and down a few times, because it's so excited, causing my stomach to have a case of butterflies. But I like when you give me butterflies. I like that it's been over two years and you still give me butterflies...

I like that it's been over two years and my breath still catches in my throat when you look into my eyes for a long time and then whisper, "I love you Claire." I love that I still try so hard to explain to you just HOW MUCH I love you, and what I love about you, but I never really seem to find the right words that explain how I feel. But I do love you. Even when you're miles away from me and I sit here in your living room with your dog and my burned chocolate chip cookies, trying to wait for you to come home.